What I Wore: Coming Clean and Getting Authentic

Tuesday, March 5, 2013

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What I Wore: Shirt (ModBod), Blazer (Cat World via Yesstyle.com), Locket (Gift), Bracelet (New York and Company), Pants (Wet Seal), Shoes (Old Navy)


This tree and boulder combo has fascinated us since the blog started; we pass on the way to many of our common photo shoot locations, but have never stopped at it before. It reminds me of one of those screen-savers. You know the ones; they're all very calm and mediative somehow.

We probably could have used some of that calm at the photoshoot. As it was, an act of carelessness led to the camera being left on the roof when we drove from this site and...yeah. You all know how that story ended. The Boy is a very positive person, the doesn't-cry-over-spilt-milk kind, but this is one of those infuriating moments where you know it didn't need to have happened, right? Strangely, one thing that he said about it was that it woke him up and reminded him that he wanted to live a more deliberate life. This has manifested in cleaning out the home office and getting projects done while we wait for the new camera to arrive.

But it got me thinking too. What does it mean to live a deliberate life. Honestly, things have been crazy around these parts. I never feel like I'm quite all there. You might not have been able to tell; it hasn't been mentioned on the blog. I like to keep Never Fully Dressed (Without a Style) a positive place because it is my place on the internet and there is enough negativity out there. But there's a line between positivity and authenticity, and somethings I've been afraid to mention here. So...

Things I've been afraid to mention

1) I substitute teach. This is not where I ideally want to be; I want to teach in an elementary classroom of my own. Every single job I've applied to for the last five years has literally had over a hundred applicants each. Usually more. If you've been job hunting recently, this is not news, but if you want to tell me about how you just sort of fell into your job thirty years ago...well, then it is news. Hiring time is coming around again, and can, at times, be very hard to face and be positive about. But you gotta try. 

2) I suffer from chronic migraines. I'll admit to the silver lining that other people might have worse migraines. I don't generally throw up, nor do I go temporarily blind, as some do. But I get them all the time, and they are still pretty debilitating. There are a lot of things that can trigger my migraines and I'm not always as careful as I should be, but sometimes I am and I still get them. Certain meds tend to help a lot, but I'll average nine or ten migraines a month. This is a big goal of the summer: get my headaches more under control. 

3) I've mentioned earlier that a family member came home from the hospital. Obviously, I can't talk too much about this for their privacy. Still, being part of a person's support network and one of the primary caregivers to a elderly person can sometimes seem to take over. 

4) I'm not sure most readers are very clear on where I live. And maybe you don't care (that is perfectly fine). I live with my parents. Yes, I'm sure some people would say this is rather sad and pathetic. It works for us, and I've always been grateful. My parents are in many ways my closest friends. We live in one town and The Boy lives in another town. I'll be moving there after the wedding, and stay there now from time to time. We are working on decorating it and fixing it up. It is not such a long distance relationship as many; we probably shouldn't complain, but it can get old to travel the thirty miles back and forth all the time. I am beyond excited to be living in the same place so soon. He's the last person I want to talk to before I go to sleep and the first one I want to see on waking up! 

5) Is it okay to talk about the wedding here? I'm never very clear on how much it too much. No one wants to be a wedding-bore, nor a bridzilla. I'm not going to say wedding planning has never been stressful, but mostly it has gone surprisingly well (ask me again in a month and you might get a different answer). All our vendors but the baker have been hired, and all our venues booked. We start the pre-martial counseling with the pastor tomorrow. I've got my dress, and the bridesmaids are getting theirs. It has kept us busy. A good busy, but busy nonetheless. 

What does it all mean in terms of living a deliberate life? Not sure, but I think it is something I'll be exploring in the upcoming months (and blog posts). After all, I'm beginning a new chapter in my life here soon. Might as well be looking at what else that can mean besides a new mailing address. <>


29 comments

  1. I love that rocky backdrop. I suffered from chronic migraines. I did a 7 day juice fast and stopped taking the pain meds. My headaches went away. Eating mostly organic/non-processed and really turned things around for me.

    Good luck!

    The Nautical Owl

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    1. What is a juice fast? Are you only eating/drinking juice? Mine seem to come from not eating regularly enough (on a schedule, I mean, not amounts), hormone cycles and certain foods. I'll need to look into this.

      None of my pain meds are preventative; just for when the headaches come, though of course I try not to take too many if they don't work at once so not to get "rebound" headaches.

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  2. That is a very interesting backdrop.

    It's hard to go too much wedding, I am sure you could share pieces here that would still fit in well with your blog. Maybe invitation advice/ettiquite or some of the fashion pieces that go into a wedding :)

    Mrs. Lopez of lovinglifeinpink.blogspot.com

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    1. Very reassuring to know people would be interested. I like the idea of invitation etiquette too! Thanks for the great idea.

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  3. I love you! It's nice to share some personal things- your blog manages to have lots of interesting variety, and I think there is room for vulnerability.

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  4. I love how honest this is and that you trust all of us enough to share personal things. I won't comment on everything you listed, but just know that you have an entire of community of people (especially the Flock Together girls) all of the world who are here to listen whenever you need us. Oh, and as for the wedding stuff, I think I speak for all of us when I say that we would LOVE to hear details :)

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  6. I love this post so much. I too have a hard time opening up on my blog and have a scheduled post on Sunday addressing this same topic! It can be so easy to talk about a bad day or things that bring people down but why would you? I feel like showing positivity is very infectious and I couldn't imagine being any other way. I know some people view it as only showing one side to your life or trying to be "perfect", but it's just a matter of being the best you and trying to motivate others to do the same.

    I'm glad your wedding planning is going well. I know how hard it was for me so it's nice to hear that you didn't have the same experience. I kinda felt weird talking about my wedding on my blog as well but most people were inquisitive and curious. Embrace it girl, so many of us are excited about it and love hearing about it :)

    xo

    Ashley

    Southern (California) Belle

    P.S. No shame in living at home too. Family will always be your strongest bond (other than your hubby) and there's nothing wrong with living with them while you're getting your life ready to become a married woman.

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    1. Exactly Ashely. I really do think there is enough negativity out there and that we can use more positivity. Still, it is an interesting balance to be authentic/vulnerable too. It makes the choice to be positive that much more powerful when you know it is a real person behind the blog. Blah- blathering on now!

      What I really mean to say is I'm very interested to see your post on the topic. Also, thanks for your comments :)

      Lol, wedding planning. I used to stage-manage, so I think that helps. I've been treating it a lot like I would a theatre job. It makes senses I suppose that people are interested (I always am when hearing about someone else's wedding).

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  7. I definitely know how hard the job hunt can be and am sending you best thoughts on that! I def can see sub-ing wouldn't be your ideal but I still think it's pretty awesome of you! I don't know if you have to write cover letters and such for teaching positions like "normal" ones but if you ever wanted an extra eye on one I'd be glad to look it over for you since I've been doing my fair share of that lately. I'm sorry to hear about your migranes & your family member, but that is really wonderful you are taking care of him or her. And of course I agree that there's nothing wrong w/ living at home,heck, if I weren't married I probably would just to save money since I'm always at work or class anyway. When is the date for your wedding btw? Glad to hear the wedding planning is going well so far and that something good can come from a bad mishap. I loved your honesty here. Oh and the location really is impressive!
    http://dusanabotswana.com/

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    1. Thank you Dus. I appreciate that!

      Also, my wedding is June 22,2013.

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  8. I left home pretty much right after college, which is unusual since in most Asian families, the children live at home with their parents until marriage. There's nothing wrong with it and it makes perfect sense on so many levels - our parents spent so much time to raise and take care of us, why are we in such a rush to flee?

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    1. I hadn't thought of it like that; thank you Lisa.

      Part of my reason for living there too is that when I did have a place of my own, I still ended up spending most evening at my parents. It makes sense in our case.

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  9. Amazing backdrop! I have to say (and this is probably a weird compliment for a fashion blog) but I love your photography. The editing is great -- just the right amount of photos and variation in cropping and angles. I think that must be a weird compliment, but I'm always so impressed by your posts.

    xoxo

    ~Meghan

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    1. Meghan,

      No that is not weird at all. Fashion blogging is so visual, and having good photos is something The Boy (my photographer) and I actually put a lot of effort into, so it it really nice that you noticed. The Boy was tickled at the comment. :)

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  10. adore these pants. You look stunning. Fabulous post, love. If you get a sec, I'm sharing my surprise gift from Lauren Conrad on my blog today as well as a giveaway. I'd love if you'd swing by. xo

    www.fashboulevard.blogspot.com

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  11. Really like how these pictures turned out. And your blazer and pants combination is so pretty!

    Have a nice day,
    -Kati

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  12. Just lovely, you look gorgeous in that outfit.

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  13. Liking your honesty here :)
    I don't think you need to hide or apologize about living with your parents. I moved out as soon as I could because I needed to be independent (I even moved countries and eventually continents...) but I'm sure living at home has a lot advantages. Sorry to hear about your migraines! That's awful!

    And lovely outfit!

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    1. Thank you Vanessa. I don't feel badly about living with my parents, but it was one of those weird situations to bring up, and this seemed like a good place to do so.

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  14. It's so nice to get to know you a bit more Kristin :) I feel like I can relate a little to some of the things you've opened up about. I've been in a four year relationship and I still live with my parents too, my boyfriend live about 30 kilometers away and we only see each other on the weekends. I get a lot of questions about this, especially from american readers who are often already married on my age! I never really now how to address it either, it's just the way things go here in Belgium. None of my friends are married at 21, haha, but I've seen so many of my blogging friends get married over the past two years and they always come back to me to ask me when it's my turn. We're probably not even moving in together for the next 2 years! Oh, now we're talking weddings, I'd love to read more about the preparations of your wedding! But maybe it could nice to keep us in the dark and share about the location, dress, ... later on too :D Teasers are annoying, but they can be fun too ^^ x

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    1. I know what you mean about knowing all these people who married young. I'm glad that if was the right choice for them, but I couldn't have imagined being married young; wouldn't have been ready for it.

      It is good to know people are interested in the wedding prep stuff. I think I will try to post more after all!

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  15. Oh no. I'd be so sad for the camera, but you look really great and I appreciate the honesty behind this post that has you sharing more about yourself. I think it's fine to live at home (I do) and I think it's okay to keep job hunting and to share your wedding!

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  16. OH CRAP! That would kill me. I recently almost killed my camera in a drop - it wedged the lens onto the body and we were unable to get my lens and the cap off without a LOT of force. Fortunately, on our way to Disney, JAson got a mini screwdriver and was able to fix it. But it was awful!

    This location is perfect, by the way, and the photos are beautiful.


    Also, talk about your wedding all ya want! We love it. Trust me. IT's nice to see someone else happy! And jobs are tough - you'll find something, but it takes forever. I know it well. It gets so frustrating. And migraines! My sister gets those and has been on tons of medications over the years, I remember how bad they could get. I

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    1. Ah! I just realized I never replied to this. I just wanted to say thank you for your words of encouragement :)

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  17. I just re-read this post and realized I hadn't made any comments. I was just going to say that being a regular follower of your blog, I feel like I knew some of these things, except for the headaches, of which I'm sorry to hear about. Someone above mentioned juicing, that's always a great idea for adding nutrients you might be missing. Also food alergies, such as gluten and soy can be a problem too. In general, I find I am hesitant to share anything toooo personal on my blog, I think everyone just finds the balance they are comfortable with. I feel that my life is about to explode with changes, and just maybe, I'll share some of it on my blog :). Thanks for all you do, for your inspiration, and have a beautiful day!!

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    1. Good point about the nutrients. I did a lot of diet changes trying to find out what was causing my migraines when I first started getting them in high school (10 years ago, yikes!) and sure enough some did get triggered by caffiene and peanut butter. It has been a long time; I should look at food allergies again.

      Thank you for your words of encouragement and for taking the time to comment :) I hope these changes go well in your life and if you are comfortable that you will share them. Have a great day too!

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